Happy Holidays

Okay, it's Vacation time for me... Thank you all so much for such an amazing year... I WUV you All!!!!

I'll be back next year.

Now, I would like to share this story sent to me from my friend Cassandra via email this morning:

When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where.

More stress.

Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys.

So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink.

In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor.

He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?"

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree...

Have Fun, Be Safe, and Remember to pratice your Swan Kick.

Toy Store

First of all, thank you all very much for your messages and emails regarding my sickness. I'm feeling a LOT better now.

Another thing... Sorry, that I cannot send out pictures of those sexy hunky delicious straight boys... Mainly, because I prank them unintentionally and they probably don't want their pictures to be passed around the internet... So, to respect their privacy, I've decided to be selfish and keep all the pictures to myself.

Anyway. This past weekend, I did manage to go to the mall with the love birds. While the two were busy in the stationary store, I went down to the toy store.

I know, I'm already over the hill, but I still find toy stores fascinating.



In the store, there were SALE signs all over the place. People formed lines in front of the cashiers. Kids running around.

I felt like I was in the zoo.

But never less, the toys still send dazzles to my eyes.



Some toys are just so clever. Companies must have been brain storming to come up with the most brilliant idea and combined it with the latest technology to produce those toys.

As I was walking down... I noticed there was a little girl sitting on the ground. She was playing with a toy car.



Out of the blue, she pushed the toy car and slams it against my foot.



Of course, my instinct took over... And...



...And I started to think about how she would be so dead if I kick her for real.



But something has to be done.

I expect an apology from this rude little girl.

Where were her parents?

They were not around.

I must tell the little girl that she did was very wrong.

And she must apologize to me.

I rehearsed the phrases in my head... Then I bent over, lower my head to her level...



She looked at me.

Meeting her eyes, I opened my lips..

Then...



I burped.

I burped. Oh yes, I burped.

I BURPED!

And IT WAS LOUD!!!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! How embarrassing!!

Without a second thought, I turned my body and ran like crazy.

*Cough* *Cough* *Cough*

When am I ever going to finish the post that I was writing?

*Cough* *Cough* *Cough*

Work suh busy...

*Cough* *Cough* *Cough*

and I'm sick...

*Cough* *Cough* *Cough*

Sux!

Lucky Sandy

As many of you have read my earlier post. Yes, I got prank call, and stored the prank call number in my cell phone.

I've thought about calling back, and yet, I don't want to get myself involved in the nasty. (Rather, I don't want them to know WHO called them back)

As if I was driven by animalistic instinct, I created a new email account on Yahoo, and used the new email to post an online ad on a popular "Woman Seeking Man" dating/hooking dating website:

Hi, I'm a 32 years old woman living in the city. I may not have the perfect supermodel figure or the long curly blond hair, but this 5'7" Brunette can definitely make your wildest fantasy come true. Tell me what you like, then I'll give it to you. If you are only looking to date, have dinner or watch a movie together... That would be fine too, as long as you don't mind a complimentary blow job.

Due to the fact that I will not have access to my computer later today, please call me at (XXX)XXX-XXXX

Let's talk, soon. XOXOXO Sandy.

After three hours, I went and deleted the post from the dating site. I never intended to leave the ad forever. I would assumed, that within the three hours, someone would call to request the complimentary blow job.

Who knows, maybe no one called.

Then I went to Yahoo to delete the Sandy account. And I found 6 new emails in the inbox.

They were from the people who responded to the ad. (Pictures attached too!)

I opened the first one... Found a brief romantic description of a 35 years old guy's status... And then picture...

OH MY GAWD! WHAT A FINE ITALIAN STUD!!!!!

I clicked the NEXT link, and went to the next email.

Found a similar email... A brief message.... then the picture...

OH MY GOSH!! THIS IS ONE GORGEOUS ASIAN GUY!!!!!

The next email contains the picture of a CUTE College Boy wearing a baseball cap.

And then a dark hair HANDSOME fella with goatee, wearing suit & tie.

But we all know that nothing is perfect in the world... The email followed the previous one, was sent from someone who is old enough to be my grandpa.

I light-speed-clicked on the NEXT link before the picture was fully loaded.

The last email sent me to the roof top. Not only the email description contained XXX-rated reading materials, but the sender is a...

A FIRE FIGHTER!! ADIOS MIO!!

The attached was a head-less upper body photo, but damn, those pecs... And the muscular arms...

My jaw dropped... Why were there so many gorgeous looking straight SINGLE guys out there? *GASP* Mostly in the emails, the intention was for pure hook-up... But the Italian guy... Hot Damn... He actually wanted to ask Sandy out on a date, wrote a bit about his personal life, career and what he's looking for in a woman (partner).

WHY AM I NOT A WOMAN?!

The thought ran though my mind, but quickly vanished from the back of my head.

Why do I have to be a woman to get a guy like him? I can easily knock him down and tie him up with my jump rope.

But anyway, I felt guilty for posting the Sandy ad and mislead those guys. (Who knows, some guys who didn't email, probably called... Or even, those who wrote the email... ALSO called...)

Oh gosh, I'm such a heart-breaker.

Lucky Voodoo Dildo Girl, she's probably sitting in the tree with the Fire Fighter.

Thief of the Night III

Part I
Part II


"B*TCH!!"

"I'm your MASTER!"

"OBEY ME!!"

Wayne wanted to scream as he prepares to whip Detective Ray with the belt.

Then, all of the sudden, he felt something wet.

His palm was wet.

"Holly Molly!! What did..." Wayne gasped as he shines the flashlight at Stanley's groin. The lower half of his pants was soaked in wetness.

"You freakin' Pissed!!"

Wayne took a few steps back.

"Disgusting!!"

Stanley glared at Wayne.

"You....!!!!" Wayne wiped his hands against his thigh..."Eeeeeek!!"

I need to go wash my hands.

I need it now.

I need to wash my hands.

Damn it!

Argh!

Wayne panics. The only way out of the bookstore was though the front entrance, which, is blocked by the chained up Detective Ray.

The more Wayne thought about the urine on his hands, the more he wanted to free himself from the prison he created.

"Un...Untie your self!" Wayne barked at Detective Ray.

"How?" The blushing detective asked.

"I'm not touching' you." Wayne hissed.

"Fine. Let it be."

Wayne turned his body and started to walk toward the back of the store.

Lack of sufficient of light source, Wayne failed to see the roll of tape in front of his foot.

The sound of PHEW was soon followed by a Bang, as Wayne slipped and fall onto the floor. The back of his head smashed against the tiled floor.

"Wayne?" Detective Ray whispered.

"You okay?" He whispered again.

Wayne, flat on the floor, remained silent.

Stanley struggled, tried to free himself from the bondage.

Arrgggh....

Hmmmm....

Uhhhh....

He let out of sight. He couldn't free himself.

From exhaustion, he closed his eyes and allowed his body to sleep.



Next day.

Early Morning. Detective Stanley Ray was found tied to the bookstore gate along with the body of amber haired Wayne. (Right. This Wayne is not the Wayne!)

"Toxic Urine killed Midnight Thief" was the headline printed on the cover of local paper. The media, questioned Stanley Ray on how he managed to trap the thief, and what he ate the night before to produce the killer urine. Detective Stanley Ray became an over night sensation.

He went on talk shows, made appearances in commercials and magazine covers. The instant fame brought him the wealth that he had never expected. Shortly after, he quit his job with the Police Department and opened his own Private Eye agency.

Two years after, on a Wednesday afternoon. Stanley Ray sat in his office, reviewing the new cases that he got in the morning.

A knock from the door alarmed him.

He placed the documents in the drawer and answered..."Come in."

Door opened.

A man stood at the door way.

Stanley Ray gasped.

"I... You... I..."

The man took off his hat, a glaze of garnet shines over his amber hair, as he walked passed the dime office light. He sat himself down in front of Stanley, with a grin on his face.

"I want you to find The Paper Tiger for me." asked the man.

Stanley smiled.

Phone Memory III

My, it has been YEARS since I last received a prank call.

But, yesterday at work, someONE called me on my cellphone.

Wayne: "Hello?"

Female Voice: "Hello...*static* *static*...May I speak to...*static* *static*"

Wayne: "I can't hear you."

Female: "Who is this?"

Wayne: "...Wayne."

Female: "WENG? OKay, Hi Weng....*static* *static* I'm a sales representative... And I was wondering if you are interested in a voo *static* *static* *static* Doe."

Wayne: "I'm sorry? I didn't get what you just said."

Female: "I said, would you be interested in a VooDoo Dildo."

Wayne slowly got up from his chair, and closed the door.

Wayne: "A VooDoo Doll?!"

Famale: "A..*static* *static* Doe."

Wayne: "Uh, No thank you."

Female: "*static* *static* *static* *static* La?"

Wayne: "The static is realy bad. No thank you."

Women: "Okay...."

Then there came some voice from the background on the other side of the phone.

Women: "Wait, Wait! Hello Hello?"

Wayne: "Yes?"

Woman: "Well, by the way, just to let you know, you do get a complimentary blow job."

Wayne, with the gayest tone of voice: "Sweetie, you think your milkshake is better tha mine? Well, my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. And they're like, GAY. Get it, Sistah?"

*The woman hangs up the phone*

*******************
Silly Rabbit, she didn't have her Caller ID Block thingy on... So I saved her number in my cell phone. Hrm, I wonder what I should do with it...

House of Flying Daggers

(Okay Robert, does the title got you excited?)



Ty, Robert's friend in Cali and I have been exchanging few email. And he sent me this picture in the recent email.



He named it "Takeshiismine.jpg"

TAKESHI IS MINE

Well, Ty, if I were to be in the movie with Takeshi, AHEM. It will be like this:











That's right. The House of Slutty Daggers.

The Conservative Ones...

"Welcome, to ******'s 2004 Christmas Party!!" the DJ raised his voice as he played the next 80's dance track.

Last night, tagging along with my Boss, Manager, and Co-workers, we've arrived at the Hotel, where the department year-end party took place.

Well, it was better than last year. I guess the company got more budgets to invest on entertainment this time of the year.

There were food, drinks, men, women, tables, candle lights... I felt like I was in the middle of a flea market. There weren't enough tables for all the guests; we ended up eating our dinner standing by the cocktail table.

No matter, the food was great. I had three plates of desserts. (YUM!)

Mag, who was born with jumpy feet, was eager to head to the floor.

"Wayne, want to go dance?"

"Sure."

As soon as we stepped onto the dance floor, other people started to populate the empty corners.

No one was willing to be the first one on the floor...

We danced a little, and then my Manager Landy joined us.

The entire time, I couldn't resist but to look at the pretty around me.

And there were so many handsome guys in suit... Just standing there watching the crowd dancing.

Were they SHY?

Do they felt uncomfortable dancing with Co-Workers?

Need another glass of Apple Martini?

There was one particular guy who really caught my eyes. He was about 6'2" tall, dirty blond hair, grey-blue eyes, and broad shoulders and hard chest. His grey suit fits his body like a skin-tight jump suit. (AND HE GOT A$$!!)

The entire time, he stood at the edge of the dance floor, chatting with people. One after another, people seem to know him very well... Yet, from my impression, he was either too shy or just waiting for people that he knows, to drag him onto the dance floor.

Out on the dance floor, I wasn't the only dancing Diva-man. There were several other guys who could really shake their a$$es... There was one dark-skin Middle Eastern guy (VERY HANDSOME) who was constantly dancing with a girl pal... Non-Stop. And there were a couple mature guys that set my gay-dar off like an alarm.
And, of course, there was this 5'8" dark brown hair guy with muscular built body, who constantly walking in and out of the dance floor. He would "pretend" to be checking his cell phone, or "pretend" to be looking for someone among the dancing crowd... But I knew, he wanted to dance. But he didn't know anyone who he can dance with.

(Oh, I know what you are thinking... I was already dancing with Mag!! Besides, I didn't want to OUT myself at work...YET)

But anyway, I was soon distracted by Destiny's Child's "Lose My Breath" to notice the cute guys anymore. We all danced until we were covered in sweat.

The Thief of the Night Part II

*********************************
Okay, before I get to the story... I'm going to full-fill your request.

And... Please... I'll need help identifying some names as well...


From the left, we have Moo Moo, Traveling SpotLight, TunaGirl, Bonnie, CJ69, and the back of 1000 Words' head.


Then we have the back of Tinmanic's head, 1000 Words, 1/2 of Traveling Spotlight's face, and The Executive.


Then we have Wayne, Country Boy and Crash.


Here we have Traveling Spotlight, TunaGirl, The Executive and ??? (BLOG URL?).


Hot Toddy lifting Jere's legs up. (I'm innocent. I don't know anything)


Here we have Splenda and Bokey on the train.

*********************************

Part I


"Detective Ray! What... What are you doing?!"

Stanley Ray, continues to unbutton his shirt.

Sense the fire in his eyes, Wayne realized that his fantasy is about to come true. Reaching down, he started to unto his belt.

Stanley pulled off his shirt... Revealing the fine cut muscular arms. The white tank top, fit perfectly against his lean defined body, like another layer of his skin. The scent of this man, quickly filled the bookstore. Wayne inhaled every bit of his man... His heart continues to pump blood down to his lower body...

"Wayne..." Stanley leaned forward.

Feeling the eraction underneath his latex pants, Wayne sat up and faced Stanley.

"Shouldn't we... I mean... Why don't we head to the Mattress department?"

"Why?"

"Well, I mean... It's kind of uncomfortable here..." Wayne looked down on the floor.

"It doesn't matter." Stanley reached for his flash light.

Without giving it too much thought, Wayne quickly removed his shirt.

Suddenly, Stanley turned his flash light toward himself, right onto his chest.

"See this?" He asked.

"Huh...?" Wayne was about to unzip his pants.

"See this scar?"

Wayne took a closer look at Detective Ray's chest.

"Right. A big scar."

"I want to get rid of it."

"Uh, alright. It looks fine with me. As a matter of fact, it kind of turns me on." Wayne reaches for Stanley’s tank top.

"Well, I'm too embarrassed to go see a Dermatologist... Any suggestions how I could get rid of this?"

Wayne paused.

"What?"

"I'm asking you how I can get rid of this scar."

Wayne sat back down.

"Well, Detective, you can find a lot of scar-soothing lotions on local drug store. If the cashier asked, you can simply say that you are buying it for your wife."

"What brand?"

"Well, there's the Palmer's Scar Serum. It’s best that you apply it to your skin after shower. Use circular motion and rub the serum into your skin. Let it dry before you apply any body lotions. The serum contains Vitamin E...And... Wait... Is this the reason that you tricked me out tonight?"

"You're the only person that I can ask..."

Upset, Wayne turned his upper body around and wept.

"Wayne, what's wrong?"

Stanley crotched forward... Then with the speed of light, Wayne gave him a deadly back-thrust kick and knocked Stanley back.

The impact sent Stanley's body backward...

BOINK.

Stanley' head collide against the edge of the book shelf, and fell unconscious.

"Pffft. Silly rabbit, you think I would let this opportunity slip?" Wayne whispers under his devilish grin.

Wayne bent down to check if there are any serious injuries on Stanley.

Muhahhahahahaahhaa... Wayne couldn't hold his excitment. He pulled the bookstore gate down on, and chained it to the ground.

He looked over to the fallen Stanley.

Muhahahahaahahaha... This is going to be one sizzling night... He thought.

Wrapped his arms around Stanley’s chest, he dragged him toward the entrance. The firm chest felt so good under Wayne's finger.

You're mine... Muahhaahhahahahaa....

Then he tied Detective Ray's arms and legs to the gate with plastic straps. (The thing that people tie bundle of books with)

Wayne, stood in front of Stanley, admiring the captured beast.

A beautiful beast.

"Come on, baby, time for you to wake up."

Wayne walked up to Stanley, and places his right hand firmly around Stanley's masculine jaw.

"uh......." He moaned.

"Look what I've captured, Detective."

Wayne licked Stanley's lips.

"Uhhh......"

Wayne sinks his tongue deeper and parts the lips...

"Hmmm....."

Wayne bites down on Stanley’s lower lips.

His body jerked to the pain. Stanley opened his eyes. Shocked, he moved his body forward as if he was about to knock Wayne onto the floor.

Wayne jumped back.

CLING... Cling...

The gate vibrates to Stanley's struggle...

"Arrggghh!!!"

"Never underestimate the power of Plastic." Wayne said.

"Let go of me!!"

"I will. After I'm done having some...FUN with you."

"Help!! HELPEEEE ANYONE...."

Wayne threw a punch at Stanley.

"Bastard. Hush!!" Then he stuffed his spare blue froggy boxer into Stanley’s mouth.

"I can't kiss you, but at least I can use my tongue on other parts of your body." Wayne winked at the struggling creature.

Wayne reached down and pulled Stanley’s belt off.


To be Continued...

Oh, yeah, the photos!

Well, it all started when I RAN and RAN and RAN and RAN and caught the latest train to the city. (I was planning to take an earlier train to the city, so I can make it to the Therapy Bar on time. But... I fell asleep in the bath...tub...)



Anyway, I made it to the bar in one piece. But it was so dark, I couldn't see anyone... (too many pretty eye candies, I was too shy to stare at their pretty faces)

So, desperately, I stood at the entrance, text-messaging Crash. (Hoping that he would tell me where the bloggers are)

Then, suddenly, this gorgeous lady walked though the door.

"Wayne!"

"OH HI!!!!!"

"I NEED A DRINK" she said.

She dragged me into the bar... And just happened, that all the bloggers were hanging out in the back corner, by the wooden table.

Then I saw him and him and him and him and HER! (YAY)

There's him and him and him and him and him and him and... Ack. I lost count...

Then later in the evening, like a Diva, this guy arrived in style. Hot Toddy style!

We all chatted and chatted and chatted. There were lots of butt rubbing and grinding and touching. (Uh, yeah)

I don't even remember exactly how many butts that I have rubbed mine against. (One good thing about standing right in front of bar counter, is everyone who wants to get a drink, would have to rub their body against mine... Oh baby)

Anyway, words couldn't quite describe that night. So, here are the PICTURES!!
Click Me Click Me!!

(Email me at if you want the full-version, high resolution copies of the photos)

********************
Just an after thought.

Hrm, I'm not much of a bar person... Haven't been too many bars in my life... For some reason, I have been having problem "Opening" up at bars. (No. Not spreading my legs, you sicko!) I hope some of the guys/gals there won't think of me as a quiet cocky stuck up quiet b*tch. I just didn't know what to say... Or how to start a conversation that doesn't involve face care products.

Forgive me, for being shy. Next time, I'll let you rub your crotch against mine... For a fee, that is.

The Thief of the Night

With a swift dash, Wayne slide his body though the narrow opening before the gate fully dropped to the ground.

Thank Gawd I didn't have Waffle for breakfast. He thought.

Wayne remained crotched on the ground until the sound of the security cart drifted toward the other side of the building.

Back on his feet, he pulled out a tiny flash light.

Samuraki Mall. Unlike how it was during the day, it was a lot quieter than he expected. Wayne was here earlier today, he toured the entire mall and make mental notes on the location of surveillance cameras and the quickest route to his destination. The tiny flash light provided little help. Soon after his eyes were accustomed to the darkness, he put it back into his waist bag. Moving in the same complete silence with the mall, Wayne allowed his mental map to guide him to the book store.

Yes. The Bookstore. That's exactly what his client wanted. As indicated in the email, Wayne must retrieve the only copy of "The Paper Tiger" from the bookstore.

Why didn't he just go buy it? Wayne questioned when he first read the email from his client. But it was not his job to question the motive of the client. After all, he's getting paid for this job.

It didn't take Wayne too long, before he reached the closed bookstore. With a sly grin on his face, he detached 3 explosives off his belt.

Two tighten at the opposite end of the gate, and one at the top.

Wayne took several steps back... And then upon the press on a button, the explosives let out a tiny "Psssst" sound. The gate fell flat onto the floor.

BOooooooooooooooooOOOoooooM. Boom.

The mall was filled with the echo of the sound made by impact as the gate hit against the marble floor.

RATS! Wayne slammed his palm against his temple.

Damn Stupid! He shook his head.

But at this hour, no one would be patrolling in the mall. Wayne calmed himself down and then proceeds into the store.

With the aid of the tiny flash light, Wayne walked down isle.

Paper Tiger... Paper Tiger... Where are you?

All of the sudden, a beam of flash light shined through the glass window into the store.

Wayne quickly dodged onto the floor, and crawled behind a near by cabinet.

"I know you are here."

Detective Ray stood at the entrance. His piercing blue eyes scanned though the bookstore.

"Surrender yourself, Wayne. You know as much as I do, there's no way out."

There's only one exit to this place is the entrance!! And it's blocked by Ray's tall muscular figure.

Wayne kept his silence.

"Don't make me hurt you."

Detective Ray took another step into the bookstore.

Eyes following Ray's every move, Wayne remained hidden behind the cabinet.

Even with limited source of light, Wayne could still clearly see the 32 years old Stanley Ray by the entrance. He didn't change much since the last time they encountered each other at the Gallery. It was 3 three years ago when Stanley was sent to guard "Victoria's Diamond Panties" from Wayne. His masculine jaw line, broad shoulder and strong muscular arms sent pulses of electric shock though Wayne's back. Hair as dark as midnight, and blue eyes filled with determination made Wayne body rise in temperature. Faintly, Wayne can hear Stanley's heavy breath... It so steady and deep... As if a wolf is hunting for it's prey. A slight groan is mixed with his breath. So sultry... And sexy... I wonder how it would sound if the groan is made from pleasure? Underneath that grey long sleeve shirt, lies that solid chest. Wayne imagined himself smoothing his hands on his chest... Rubbing lower and against his hard nipples... And slowly, lower the hands down, following the treasure trail...to...

"Found 'The Paper Tiger' yet?"

Wayne woke from his sudden fantasy. It was a TRAP!! He kept his eyes on Detective Ray's flash light.

"And I thought you are smarter than that." said Detective Ray as he walked further into the bookstore.

He reached into his chest and slowly pulled out a gun.

"If you surrender now, I promise that I will not hurt you." He shined the flash light at the 'Sci-Fi' section.

Just before Detective Ray's light reached the 'World History' section, Wayne reached for the thickest book by his shoulder and threw it at him.

The book knocked Detective Ray's gun out of his hand. Recovered from the sudden attach, he bend down and reached for the fallen gun. Without hesitation, Wayne leaped out from the corner and forced his body on Detective Ray.

Wayne kicked the gun out of Stanley’s reach. But within seconds, he felt a force driving from his chest up to his neck.

It's warm...

He reached up to his neck, only to find Detective Ray's firm grip on his throat.

Wayne struggled, but Detective Ray is stronger than him.

"Don't Move! Or else, I'll break your neck."

Breathing slowly, Wayne hung limp under his strong grip.

"Listen... I won't hurt you... But you must promise me that you will not run or fight." His soften his voice.

Wayne nodded his head.

Stanley released his grip... And Wayne fell onto the ground.

"Are you okay?"

Stanley Ray kneeled down and put his hand behind Wayne's back.

Catching up with breath, Wayne turned his head and look at his face.

"This is the only way that I can speak to you... Alone." He reaches for Wayne's hand. And Wayne let him hold his.

So warm... And gentle...

"What... What do you want from me?" Wayne asked.

Stanley moved closer to Wayne. Their faces were only few inches apart. The gentleness in Stanley's eyes melts the guard that Wayne had on him. Body trembling, cold sweats rolled down on his back... Wayne didn't expect this to happen... But... He wasn't scared. He was... excited.

This man is irritable.

"Wayne..."

"Yes...?"

Stanley started to unbutton his shirt...



To be continued.

The Lack Of...

Comb: "Wayne, why didn't you use me this morning?"

Wayne: "Use you on What?" *points his head*

Comb: "Oh, that's right."

Brush: "Wayne, use me!"

Wayne: "What would be the point?"

Brush: "Well... Even though there are not much to brush, but you can always use me to massage your scalp."

Wayne picked up the brush, and massaged his scalp gently.

Hair Gel: "Wayne, care for the SPIKED style?"

Wayne: "...Spike WHAT?"

Hair Gel: "Oh, sorry. You are right. The hair is not long enough."

Hair Spray: "Well.. You can..."

Wayne: "Don't even bother."

Hair Spray: "......................"


It's weird. I can't really say that I talk to myself... But sometimes, I would like "talk" for objects around me.

Oh, not out loud... In my head, of course. (The male love bird talks to himself all the time, totally freaks me out)

"Okay, anyone have any idea on how to make my hair grow faster by Friday?"

At first, people at work would try to calm me, by saying that my hair doesn't look that bad... And curses the barber who ruined my hair... Then they started to brain storm on how to put off my misery.

Mag, suggested that I should rub raw Ginger on my scalp, to simulate the roots.

Karmen suggested that I take Biotin tablets and rub Olive Oil on my (lack of) hair.

A lot of them recommand wearing a Hat... But I'm not really a hat person.

Then some guy, from the other department, suggested that I could paint my scalp black. (With Magic Markers... That's EVIL)

One thing lead to another. At the end, everyone agreed that the Spray-On-Hair is the best solution.

Pffft, like I would clog my previous pores with chemicals.

What a great way to do at lunch time, discussing my hair.

Bah.

**********
Have you seen this?

*DROOL*