Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Among the Men & Women

And Dogs.

I walked with a heavy heart. The heat was killing me, but I see it as a day to sweat off the weight.

Central Park is a big place. Despite the fact that I have been living in New York for 5 years, I have never really take my time to explore the park. But damn, there were so many HOT guys!! So Hot, that I... anyway, let's get back to the main subject.


It had been 35 minutes since I've been wondering around the park. Just where exactly is "Sheep Meadow?" I only know where the Green Thingy Cafe is... But I didn't recall a "Sheep Meado." I love sheep. Seriously. I love them. And why would it be called "Bear Hill" too? But this was giving me a nervous breakdown.

Just when I was about to faint into the arms of some random roller skater, I saw the hottest carriage driver ever!! The horse was cute too!! But then again, anyone with a sunglasses can be a hottie. No matter what, he gave me hope. He gave me the hope to go on. Anyway, the day was so hot, that I was sweaty from head to toe to undersear and feelin' mighty sticky (melted Sunblocks - SPF 29). I soon came across a group of tourists...uh, students surrounding some kind of thick pole.

The Pole!! The magical Stiffy Pole with the Map of the Entire Park, seperated by different areas and their corresponding names. And oh my gawd, that particular area is named "Sheep Meadow!"

So, the "Sheep Meadow" turned out to be the big wide grassy area where people do sunbathing and family picnics. I knew about that area all along, just didn't know it was called something else other than "Meat Market." Oh well, at least I had a good walk aroudn the lake and heard some rock music at the center stage. It was time for me to hunt down the bloggers.

After drinking two bottles of Vitamin water, I knew there was a place I had to go before heading to the Sheep Meadow: The pannel of public portable blue colored-toilets.

*fast forward 15 minutes*

Holding my breathe didn't make my pee-pee-ing experience much of a pleasure. But at least I won't have to lie about the wet spot around my crotch area to be "a lot of sweat."

I headed to the Sheep Meadow.

And Oh My Gawd. There were a lot of sheeps. Dad sheep. Mom sheep. Little Sheep. Old Sheep. Young Sheep. Topless Sheep. Sexy Hot Studly sheep surounded by Skanky sheep.

My, how am I going to find them? I thought. So I did what I thoguht woud be the wisest thing to do: Call them. Yeah. That's right. Call them. I flipped open my cellphone and selected the "Phone Book" thingy - then I realized that I don't have any of the number of the guys that I know who's going to be there. (Right Jon? If I called you, you wouldn't know where they were. Besides, you were probably still recovering from the 'fainting' incident.)

Then I did the next wisest thing. I circled around the Sheep Meadow like a shark looking for its prey.

Note to self: Sheep Meadow is pretty big. Sh*t.

I circled it twice and couldn't find any recognizable faces. I was so tired and upset. The heatwave from the burning Sun didn't help either. I felt that I was starting to get skin cancer (the sunblock that I had on my face was only SPF 20).

I felt some soreness around my nose, then followed by steams of tears...

I took out a Claritin tablet, popped it into my mouth. After a few minutes, I felt better. (Tree Pollen)

After having been in Central Park for 1 hour and 25 minutes. I felt that if I was able to find the bloggers, I would have found them already. There was really no more point for me to continue to wondering around the park. Plus, the blue hair joggler started to really freaking me out. It was time for me to head home.

Sorry Mark and Brian, I didn't get to see you guys over the weekend, but I know for sure you guys had a lot of fun. Hopefully, I will get to meet you guys (and other bloggers) at the next GB:NYC.


hot-lunch said...

oh no! oh well, at least you had a lovely walk in Central Park!! what I wouldn't give to have that right now!!

:: jozjozjoz :: said...

The "blue hair joggler" sounds very scary, indeed!

Jerry said...

I totally agree with you on the sunglasses thing. Most people can look good with shades on. That reminds me to hit Central Park this summer and um..tan horribly badly haha

Angelo said...

that was some weekend.

take care, wayne!

Brechi said...

"Sexy Hot Studly sheep surounded by Skanky sheep."

You are hilarious...I'm glad you explored the meadow.