Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Subway Tale: Baby Got Back

I don't know what to say about this. *sigh*

Every morning, my most prized reward from the long train ride, was either a fabulous nap (without me snoring or drooling all over the place) - or that an eye candy would sit by me. (Rare! Very Rare!)

On the subway, I would hope that there will be some pretty passenger that would make the 10 minute ride more enjoyable.

This morning, right after I got off the Railroad (no eye candies); I went along the massive crowd toward the subway entrance. (Weird, there were so many people this morning) Disappointed by the lack of sleep and eye candies, like a starving wolf, my eyes were hunting for eyes-creams.

Eye Candies... Eye Candies! Where are my Eye Candies!?

Nope, not here.

Nope, not there.

Nope, he's not.

Nope, he's so not.

(Sometimes, I feel so vain)

Then there I stood on the platform with a bunch of people.

Waiting for the next train.

Across the platform, I saw someone who is not really a 100% eye candy, but totally do-able. (Hush, I know. I'm a slut)

But ZOOOOOM, his [4] train arrived and took him away in a flash.

Damn it.

So I waited for a couple minutes more...

Then the [2] train came.

But it was packed with people.

Everyone, in front of me, rushed into the train and stuffed themselves like turkey fillings.

The passengers inside of the train, had the facial expression of crabs inside of the steam cooker. Struggling, they waved their arms and twist their bodies... Some screamed "HEY!!!" and some went "ARRGGGGHHH."

From the scene of that, I stepped back. Without the desire of being part of the massive torture, I waited for the next train.

After a few minutes, the [3] train arrived.

Before I had the chance to hold onto my bag, the people behind me around rushed and pushed me forward.

Surfing among the people, I was automatically sent into the train.

This train was even crowded than the first one.

No Eye Candies still.

Trying my best, I twisted my body around so I can hold onto something...

Then, that's why I realized... That I'm surrounded by bodies. Human bodies.

Wet, Humid, and Hot. (It was raining this morning)

People's body pressed tight against mine.

WHY?! Why No Eye Candies?! I screamed in my head.

It'd be heaven if I was pressing my body hard against at least ONE eye candy.


"Excuse Me" a female voice came from behind.

With the vibration of our bodies, I felt the woman moving toward the inner part of the train.

People started to twist and struggle along with her movements.

Similar to rubbing my finger deeply inside of a Jell-O pudding... I felt something cold - yet soft wrapping around my tail bone.

From the corner of my eye, I saw a woman... Forcing her to the little tiny space behind me.

And both of my bums were rubbing against her single bum (Aye Muy Grande!)during the entire movement.

This woman. Had moved behind me. Directly behind me, with her back against my back.

As if my body was sinking into a waterbed. My eyes were wide open... Starring at the ceiling... As the sensation took control of my mind.


I'm between her...

Like I have been mind-blasted... My head went blank.

The thoughts of eye candies were gone.

I begged... I begged anyone... ANYONE to move behind me... But not her... NOT HER.

Anyone... Anyone...

Then the Bum Bum Song started to play from the back of my head...

My bum is on the rail~
Bum is on the rail~
Look at Me
My bum is on the rail~


Then there came a stop, a cutie pie Turkish-looking man walked in. (He kinda looks like a younger version of Tarkan)

Like that oxygen mask that pop-out of the over-head bin on the air plane, I put 110% of my thoughts, my mind, and my soul into him.

From one end of the train to the other, he was my source of distraction... He made me forget how it felt to be stuck in between big bums. He made me appreciate how beautiful life can be for being stuck in between two wet bums.

Not sure for how long, but my stop finally came.

Like a comet flying though the starry sky, I dashed out of the train and ran to work.

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